Cross Contamination Cont...Eating Away from Home

When my daughter was diagnosed as a Celiac, it was a while before she gathered the courage to eat at a restaurant or even a friend's house. She is a particularly sensitive Celiac, so the thought of leaving her meal in someone else's care was scary...at first.
The easiest transition for my daughter was having a meal at a friend's house. Her friends became advocates for her, informing parents of her dietary needs. As an adult however, the only advocate we are likely to have is ourselves. Though you may feel at first that your are imposing on your hosts with your gf needs, don't fret. You can't help that you can't ingest gluten- so why feel guilty?
Any gracious host will be more than understanding and accommodating. Just don't spring it on them when you arrive at the door. Because if you leave your host in the dark, the only one who is going to suffer is you- being stuck with carrot sticks or ingesting gluten. Instead make a courtesy phone call, thanking them for the invitation and explain your gf needs. If they balk at this, then they aren't likely worth your time.
If your host is unsure about what to avoid in the kitchen, offer emailing a list, or direct them to a web listing of what to watch out for. Living Without magazine also has a list of foods to avoid in every issue near the back. In addition, ask the host if they are unsure whether an ingredient used is gf or not that they allow you to read the label. That way you can enjoy your meal in confidence, lacking the nagging worry of how you will feel in the coming hours.
Another tip- serve yourself first, or ask your host to allow you early entry to the kitchen or table. There may be things like bread being served, and crumbs (or serving spoons) can travel to undesired destinations such as your plate. With practice, you and your host will continue to have an open dialogue about avoiding gluten- but be their polite gentle informative guide.
Next stop on the GF Culinary Tasting Tour...Restaurants! Understandably, eating at a restaurant (whether 5 star, fast food or mall food court) can be distressing for a Celiac. There are so many more elements involved- I'm starving, where can I eat right now? Does the chef and staff truly understand what Gluten Free means? Is it a busy restaurant/time where mistakes are more likely to be made?
To get yourself started and back to enjoying eating out, refer initially to your regional celiac association. They will usually have restaurant listings that are gf friendly, and in most cases the staff are well trained in gf awareness. Plan ahead by choosing a restaurant on the list. Then call to see when they tend to be less busy, making a reservation if necessary. When you are seated, ask if a gluten free menu is available- if not, then tell your server that you are a Celiac and ask what they recommend that can be made gluten free. Remember, just because a restaurant is on a gf friendly list doesn't mean it waves your responsibility of informing staff of your needs. Very few restaurants exist that are completely gf.
When you order be very clear that your meal needs to gf, but be polite and make a point of saying thank you. I have found that politeness helps to further keep gluten at bay because your server is more inclined to be more vigilant. Simply being polite, I have had servers catch kitchen errors before the meal even reached the table. However, don't be so polite as to not question your meal when it comes. If it looks suspicious, ask. Send the meal back if needed, requesting a freshly made one.
Here are a few additional things you can do or look out for when out and about and eating gf:
1) Is it deep fried?...I have encountered a few restaurants that recommend items that are deep fried, but do not have a separate fryer for battered foods. This is not gf eating- you cannot cook gluten at a high temp to neutralize it, nor is the gluten going to stay in the oil and not your food. McDonald's is one place that does have a separate fryer for french fries vs. other battered/coated foods.
2) When there is doubt about an ingredient in a meal you would like, avoid and choose something safer, or when possible ask to read the label. I have had many places graciously pull out big jugs to let me read ingredients.
3) Avoid buffets. They are usually not gf, and if there happens to be gf items the likelihood them remaining gf is nil.
4) Avoid hard ice cream and stick to soft serve or frozen yogurt. Hard ice cream is exposed to cones that are not gf. Soft serve ice cream on the other hand comes from a dispenser keeping it gf. (Still ask about ingredients when in doubt though.) Then...ask the server to remove the nozzle on the dispenser and clean it for you- because the nozzle has come into contact with cones and other non gf ingredients. I have visited Dairy Queen on numerous occasions with my daughter, state that she is a Celiac and that ingesting minute amounts of cookie, cones, etc will have her doubled over in pain in an hour. 99% of the servers have be fantastic about cleaning the nozzle. Only one told me to "get over it".
5) Beware of sauces. Ask about ingredients. I have had many servers happily ask the chef on our behalf. When in doubt though, omit or or order a different meal.
6) Ask if your meal can be brought out separately. Some servers like to stack plates on their arm- however this increases your risk of non gf items making their way to your plate.
7) I often stress that my daughter is highly sensitive to gluten, and that croutons cannot be picked off if placed in error- that a single crumb will cause hours of torture. At times I state that she is allergic, though this is a lie- but it seems to get the point across since many are ignorant of what gluten or a Celiac is. And I am descriptive. I tell people anything with bread, cookie, cracker, etc is toxic to my daughter.
8) Ask if it is possible for a special meal that is not on the menu. Sometimes it may be a bowl of fruit, or a lettuce salad with chicken. But understand that it won't always be possible. On a number of occasions, my daughter has been made to feel like a queen- being told they would make her her own special meal.  Once, the chef came out to greet her, telling her he would make anything for her that she wanted, on or off menu- even bread. None of these places were listed on gf recommended restaurant lists, and in fact were in out of the way places. Only one was a four star establishment.
9) Have a back up plan. This means carrying a gf granola bar or other gf snack that can be easily carried with you. This is not ideal, but it prevents you from passing out from hunger in case you cannot locate a place that can be accommodating.
Now what are you waiting for?... Get out there and eat!